Baby Violet

Violet Isabelle Parker was born Sunday, August 28th, 2011 at 4:06 am. She is a beautiful baby girl and we feel so blessed that she is part of our family.

I went into labor on Saturday. I started having contractions at 3:00 PM. They would last for a minute or so but it was 20 minutes between contractions for 4 hours. During that time we packed the bag for the hospital and got Jensyn and Hurley's bags packed so they could go to Grandpa Dave's house for the weekend. We also had plenty of time to clean the house (something Darwin did not want to do). I did not want to come home to a messy house. We dropped the kids off with my dad about 8:00 PM.

I was so nervous to go to the hospital because I was scared that they were going to send me home because I was not really in labor or that I was not far enough into my labor. When we got to the hospital we walked around the perimeter of it. My goal was to do it twice but I only made it once. By the time I was hooked up to the monitors my contractions were every 3 to 5 minutes. I was dialeted to a four. The nurse asked what my pain level was and when I told her a ZERO she said, "We have to monitor you for an hour to see then." Hmm, so I am in labor but since I am not having pain I can't be admitted? Dumb to me since pain is subjective. Anyway, she called my doctor and he told her that if I wanted to be admitted then to admit me. Thank you Dr. Alejo.

Laboring away.

We did not find out if we were having a boy or a girl, which I loved and if I have another baby I wouldn't find out again. Most people (myself and Darwin included) thought I was having a boy for sure. In fact if I had to bet on it that would have been where I put my money. (So glad I don't gamble...) I was able to pull the baby out. That was amazing! I am so glad that my doctor asked me if I wanted to. The umbilical cord was wrapped around her ankle and the cord had to be cut before it could be unwrapped. It was probably two minutes after she was born that one of the nurses asked if we had a boy or a girl. I was SHOCKED when I heard, "Girl. You had a baby girl." Darwin and I had made a deal very early in the pregnancy that if I had a boy Darwin got to name him and if I had a girl then I got to name her. I never thought I would be using Violet Isabelle.

She's here!

Things were going great. I had an easy labor and delivery. I was exhausted from being up the entire night but I was excited to have visitors to come and see our precious new baby girl. Violet started to choke (making no sound at all) and the nurse was in the room and quickly went to help her. I was told that she is a "silent choker" which is very scary because there is no way to tell that she is choking unless you are looking right at her. So the nurse told me that if I fall asleep then the baby has to be in the nursery. I asked her, "What am I supposed to do at home?" No answer.

My mom brought Jensyn and Hurley up to the hospital early on Sunday morning (which I am so grateful that she did). I knew that she was going to bring the kids up after church for sure but it turned out to be a blessing that she brought them up when she did. We enjoyed spending some time together as a family of five. The peditrician was called because Violet choked again and stopped breathing. She was "dusky". The doctor told the nurses that the baby needed to be in the nursery as much as possible for monitoring.

My three wonderful kids. Jensyn and Hurley have been amazing helpers.

Sisters.

Hurley and his baby sister.

Our family.

Robyn and James, Grandma Thacker and Adele came, Travis and Crystal came, and then Mike, Deanna and Amanda came as well. I was glad to have visitors and I was looking forward to Jensyn and Hurley coming back to see there baby sister.

Amanda, Mike, and Violet.

Amanda and Violet

Grandma Thacker and Violet.

Grandma Parker and Violet.

Violet's violet bow.


Then the phone rang. It was Dr. Allred, the peditrician. He told Darwin and Violet had had four choking spells and she needed to go to the NICU for constant monitoring and tests. It felt like my heart had been ripped right out of my chest. I am grateful that Mike was there to assist Darwin in giving Violet a blessing. Violet was blessed to be healed and that she would be healthy.

It was very surreal taking her to the NICU. Darwin pushed me in a wheelchair and a nurse pushed Violet down the long halls. I remember I just cried. I can't remember leaving the NICU to go back to my room. There are so many things from those days in the hospital that are such a blur. I called my parents because I knew that they were going to be coming up with Jensyn and Hurley as soon as church was over. I was sad for those two because I knew that they weren't going to be able to see Violet and they were so excited to see her. I have no idea how many tears I cried. I am grateful for my family for coming up and for the emotional relief they offered me. I had told my little brother Darrin to come up later on Sunday afternoon because Violet needed to stay in the nursery. I didn't think about calling him later to tell him that Violet had been moved and that he wouldn't be able to see her at the hospital. My heart broke when he walked into my hospital room because I felt guilty that I asked him to come later.

She stayed in the NICU for 17 hours and didn't have another choking spell. Darwin and I were told that we could take her back to our room. We just needed the peditrican to assume care of her before she could be released. Of course we were overjoyed. I texted and called our families to tell them the good news. I watched Violet get taken out of the isolette and placed in a crib. I watched the nurse take out her IV line. I was so grateful that she was doing so much better in such a short amount of time. I was getting ready to feed Violet and I was going to hurry to the bathroom first then go. I stood up to go to the bathroom and Darwin said, "Get the nurse!" Violet was choking again. I watched her beautiful pink skin turn white then blue.It was the scariest thing I have ever seen. She didn't make a sound during the enitre episode. My heart broke. My baby was not strong enough to leave. Violet's stomach was suctioned. We were told that she had to go 24 hours without any choking spells before she could be released. I lost it. I went to the bathroom and cried. I called my mom and told her that I needed her with me. I was scared. I wanted my family to be together in one place. I went back to my room and wept. I have learned that in "fight or flight" situations I am a "flight" person and Darwin is a "fight".

Darwin came back from the NICU and told me the nurses needed me to feed Violet at 1, 4, 7, and 10. That was exhausting! It would take over an hour to feed her and change her diaper and then to go back to my room (which was pretty far and I was so slow because I had just had her) and either eat or try to sleep (impossible) I had about an hour and 45 minutes. I couldn't get my mind to stop thinking long enough to fall asleep. It didn't take long before I was mentally and physically worn out.

Beautiful Violet sleeping.

Violet and Daddy

Violet and Mommy

A very peaceful Violet. The bandaid is where her IV was.

One beautiful baby and one EXHAUSTED mom.

Violet and Daddy, trying to feel peace and not fear.

So cute.

Two tired girls. Nothing like sleeping 4 hours out of 72.

The nurses were amazing. They were positive and friendly. I felt guilty because I knew that my baby was so healthy compared to the other babies in NICU. I felt guilt that there were families that had been there for days, weeks, and months and my baby just got there. The nurses never minimized my feelings. They said that any time spent in the NICU is exhausting and stressful.

Darwin is amazing. He is so strong and has so much faith. We prayed and prayed. My testimony of eternal families has grown so much. I want my family to be together forever and I can't imagine the heartache I would feel if we were kept apart. Besides Violet being healthy the thing I wanted most was for my family to be together. It was awful knowing that I could be with Violet or with Jensyn and Hurley. My dad sent Darwin a text that said, "You take care of those two (meaning me and Violet) and we'll take care of these two (meaning Jensyn and Hurley)." That gave me peace.

Violet went 24 hours without another choking spell. we were told that we could take her home. This time we didn't tell anyone and we felt like we couldn't get out of the hospital fast enough. We arrived home at noon on Tuesday, August 30th. We all watched Jensyn get off the bus after her first day of kindergarten.